April's Sorrow
by Countess Caramel
Summary: Would sacrificing your own life make it up for your sins? Or would it just be a greater sin? What if there were no way to fix what's done except for giving up your life? Would fighting devils make you an angel, Or would it soak your soul in darkness and dirt, making you the head of the devils ? (OOC , fem!killua and fem!kurapika inside , and some pairing included )
1. Chapter 1 : June's Sorrow

_**please note that not the whole story will be about kurutas...the story is devided into four quarters,and in each one one of the main characters will appear as a hero**_

**...**

**Would sacrificing your own life make it up for your sins?**

**Or would it just be a greater sin?**

**What if there were no way to fix what's done except for giving up your life?**

**Would fighting devils make you an angel, Or would it soak your soul in darkness and dirt, making** **you the head of the devils ?**

Even in the deepest level in hell, an angel could_** always**_ create their own little piece of heaven..

That was her motto in life, and somehow she was always able to carry it out in reality..

Even when the Kuruta people had to live the worst version of hell on Earth, she was able with her pure smile to create that little of heaven... that small happy place where she and her husband lived...

The Kurutas were just a minority; a small tribe of 128 people, who lived in an isolated place called : "** Meteor City**".

People who lived there did not exist in any official records, and the existence of the city itself was known to very few people.

Not much was known about the city ;much information was covered in mystery.

The city was rumored to be five hundred years-old, and since then it had been a landfill for other countries, yet it was an abandoned area that did not belong to any country.

And since people who lived there would have accepted any trash that others threw there as a gift, they hardly ever let one takes **_any _**of their things.. as if they actually **_had_** things..

Even in the deepest levels of hell ,an angel could **_always_** create their own little piece of heaven ,but the question that unleashed itself was :"why in the world would **_an angel_** be in hell?"

So many of the Kurutas asked themselves that question, that they even forgot _**who they were**_…

The whole society had used to see the Kurutas as demons, all because of their eye color. It was unique, special ,and to-the-eyes-of-the-society-pure-evil. Their eyes used to turn scarlet red whenever one of them was enraged, or emotionally active.. too sad.. too happy.. too angry.. too excited.. too scared.. any of those would cause their eyes to glow crimson red.

If the minds of people weren't full with the whole demons thing, they would have probably seen the Kurutas' eye color as one of the most beautiful things in the world.

And because of that beautiful color, much of the Kurutas were executed throughout history.

That was what caused the Kurutas to turn into human devils, and that did not mean a supernatural change, but what it really meant was that they had to depend on theft, fraud, and murder to live

True..the society never gave them another way..they were banned from getting jobs, trading in markets, and even appearing in they wanted to get enough food to stay alive they **_had_** to be criminals, and that gave them even a worse reputation among governments and people, therefore ,policemen would immediately kill off any kuruta that they meet, and they really didn't meet a lot..

...

-"What did you say it was named ?"the woman with the sweet blue eyes and the warm pure smile asked her husband, while getting some water for the newly planted seeds.

-"June's Sorrow"the blue-eyed man answered, planting some weird looking special seed.

The blond woman approached to water the seed her husband has just planted.

"Once upon a time, there was an old woman who had three sons. however, all of them died in a war in the same day. The woman couldn't get over them, and went on crying for three days. Later ,some acquaintance gave her a seed, telling her that it was from a magical plant, and if the woman planted the seed ,the plant would grow up to tell how well were her three sons in the other life, according to its health.

Obviously ,the whole thing was just a lie that was made up to make the old woman feel better. Nevertheless ,the woman seemed to believe it. She took the seed and planted it -and that was in June- and she kept crying over her sons, while her tears were pouring to water the plant for long slow days, and painful nights..

The plant grew up and matured in August and the woman was very pleased, and eventually stopped crying"

The tall dark haired man explained to his wife "and since then, this plant was known to be planted in June and to mature in August" he continued

-"oh.."the young woman worried "it's just so sad..If I ever had children I'd wish to not lose them ever !" the woman said

A slight smile formed on the lips of her husband.

-"honey, I was just telling you the story of its name okay? And it's probably just a tale –you know..nothing real..no need to feel sad about it". The man kissed his wife's forehead ever so gently.

She was happy..so happy..no matter how bad the situation was for the Kurutas ,everything seemed to fit right in its place for her, and she could find happiness anywhere she moved, mostly because her husband was always by her side..and she didn't know he wouldn't**_ last_** there for long…..

...

I'm really sorry guys,I write very short chapters, but I promise I will update quite a lot. also,the next chapter will be longer ^_^

_**you should also note that NOT the whole story will be about kurutas...the story is divided into four quarters,and in each one one of the main characters will appear as a hero**_

I promise you much more fun and action later as this is just a start or a background

please review if you want me to upload the next chapter

flames are acceptable as they only heat me up ;p ;)

^-^ again ..please review


	2. April's Angel

I want to thank everyone who read, reviewed, followed, helped, and inspired me. thank you all,I really love you guys ^_^

special thanks for : Zozi koozy, Nispedana , Fey Tan, and Latias876 (I hope I didn't forget anyone ^^a) Arigatou~

warning: you noticed I classified the story in the drama section right? so expect real drama okay ? ;)

Read and enjoy (hopefully), and please review ^_^

* * *

The man had already convinced her how much he needed to go with the group that was going to rob the small bank in the nearest course,she didn't simply agree; that was wrong...that wasn't the way to live, and most of all that was dangerous.

She had a bad feeling about it, but she couldn't change her husband's mind who wanted to get her food, new clothes, and mostly a wedding ring that could show the world that he was hers, and she was one from Meteor City seemed to be able to afford a wedding ring, and he knew how much would it mean for his beloved wife.

the next day,the aspiring man kissed his wife goodbye and left,and she could only wish that he never left...

Two days later, the news reached Meteor city…  
There had been a Judas among the group. He was probably paid to betray them, therefore, the police was able to arrest them firstly, and execute all the members of the group later, and the Judas ran away with the money.

Everything in her life turned upside down, and she could actually feel for the first time of her life all the pain other kurutas felt, and even worse.  
She could feel a sharp knife tearing her heart into thousands of hundreds of pieces.  
Her husband was everything to her, and to her, losing him would mean losing the bones that kept her up, the soul that made her a living human-not a thing, and the purpose that kept her alive.

It was either that he was killed, or even worse; that he was the betrayer, and she prayed inside for it to be the first one. She didn't want him to be the one to betray and steal, and leave her alone all with his woman mourned her husband for slow long days and painful nights. Days passed, tears wouldn't stop, and the "June's Sorrow" plant never grew up.

by the last day of August, the plant still hadn't grew up, and the women was sure then that she was pregnant and almost at the end of her second month.  
What an unpleasant thing to discover after the death of the baby's father! Normally, that would be the greatest news a married woman would like to hear, but in her case, that was the only thing that could make her feel worse…her awaited child wouldn't have a father.

Her neighbor Shizuku,-who stayed by her side for the whole time since her husband was gone-tried to calm the blond woman's wounded heart, but it was of no use.  
However, she would still help the pregnant woman with everything she needs.  
Shizuku had brown eyes, but she was gifted with the incapability of having them turn red, and that's why she was more confident about going out in public. or wasn't it a gift?

She has always tried to convince the blond woman how bad sadness was for her health, but the blond one couldn't get all the black thoughts out of her head, and that caused her some serious headache, which grew harder day by day even in her sleep. It seemed to be some long-lasting headache that the woman started thinking that she would have to adapt to living with it for the rest of her life.  
Maybe she wasn't getting enough food for her and for the baby.

She had also passed out twice in a week, and would vomit after waking up everyday not knowing if all this suffering was merely a pregnancy sign…but what else could it possibly be?

A day after a day, those symptoms were only growing harder, and the blond woman's memories were some why floating up simply in her head…even some of the simplest memories that she thought she'd never remember…childhood friends, her mother's words, and even when her parents' friends visited them with a toy for her fourth birthday…

Was she seeing the flashback of her life in front of her eyes for the last time? Why was it so random and mixed? What did all of this mean?  
The blonde was clueless, but Shizuku did have something in mind. She suspected something else…something she would never declare…  
However, the young blond had to know sooner or later, therefore Shizuku took her to a doctor's clinic in the nearest town…a doctor who had nothing to do with pregnancy.

* * *

The doctor wasn't a kuruta, nor he had ever heard of kurutas, however, he had always been nice to Shizuku, and he would always diagnose her for free, knowing that she was a poor young woman, and so she thought he might be able to help.

After a small chat with Shizuku, the young doctor started immediately to diagnose the weak pregnant woman, and against her will he made her undergo certain tests, to finally announce a week later :  
"I'm afraid you were right Shizuku"

The widowed woman examined her friend and the doctor with her eyes: what were they hiding from her?

"I must let you know-my lady- that it is…it is most likely that you have brain tumor" the doctor said trying to hide his feelings, and to sound cold.

A moment of silent passed. The blonde's heart was beating so hard that it could almost jump out of her chest and Shizuku could almost hear the blonde's loud heartbeats.

"I'm sorry…"the doctor mumbled to the confused patient

"what? You must be wrong! It must be a mistake!" she yelled at him, unable to control her self.

"but all the symptoms, and the results of the MRI leads to this…even the random things you are remembering are caused by the tumor touching your brain cells" the doctor almost yelled

The woman's eyes widened to turn next burning scarlet, and they flooded with a huge load of tears.  
"I must not die…"her voice faded into a cry  
"I can't kill the baby" the widow continued when she was able to find her voice again

Shizuku turned her head to meet the blonde's eyes,and red they were…  
"we really shall leave!" Shizuku said and grasped the pregnant woman's hand quickly, running out as fast as possible.

That was when the doctor noticed the scarlet eyes. But obviously they wouldn't waste a moment just to witness his reaction. They decided to rush back to Meteor since they went back there, the woman never cried anymore.

"we must find another doctor, you need to have your chemical treatment" Shizuku suggested  
Shizuku knew what she was talking about as she had been to school as a kid, but the other woman never went to school, fearing that she could have been discovered as a kuruta and therefore be killed. All she knew about her sickness is that it caused death.

"are you kidding me? What if it hurts my baby?" the blond expected  
"well, to be honest, it IS most likely to do so" Shizuku answered keeping her voice low, trying not to make a problem.  
"Hell no, I'm not taking that! I've sworn on the dead body of my beloved husband to protect this child no matter what, until I die" the kuruta protested  
"and do you really **_want_** to die so badly?" Shizuku almost yelled…this seemed to hurt her friend's feelings

A moment of deadly silence passed.

"Listen!"The blond finally spoke up threatening "don't you ever tell me what to do! I'm going to live and witness my baby grow up day by day. We can't go back to that doctor nor afford the expensive treatment, and assuming that we could somehow, I still wouldn't risk my child's life-my little girl's life. She deserves a chance to live" the pregnant woman explained.

"and how can you be so sure she is a girl?" Shizuku wondered with a slight smile.

"A feeling !" the blond said teasing, smiling like she had just pulled a prank or succeeded to hide some secret…however it was actually just a feeling.

Days went on to prove the blond woman right. It truly was a girl…a very pretty girl with a beautiful face and blond hair like her mother's

The first time she got a hold of her daughter, the woman started hugging her and kissing her cheeks. The child seemed to enjoy it.

"awww honey, aren't you the most beautiful creature on earth? I think I will call you kurapika" the new mother said

"kurapika? What a weird yet beautiful name!" Shizuku responded

"well, since you-my little angel- are born in April, I will name you Kurapika, which is thought to mean in the old kurutian language :"April's angel", do you like your name sweetie?" the blond asked her child excitedly, answering Shizuku's wonders indirectly.

The child maid some noises and seemed to be happy.

As Shizuku went out to bring some water for the new mother, she noticed something different around the small house.

* * *

cheese? yes I like cheese! I might even give you the exotic delicious perfectly-tasty sandwich recipe **_which_** include cheese !

I'm sorry it took me forever to update, but I had exams

also,**_ please notice that I will be writing five fics at a time, so I will mostly update the ones getting the most reviews, so please review if you want to read more. :)_**


	3. A glimpse of vengeance

first I would like to thank everyone who read, reviewed,favorited, or followed.

special thanks to Nispedana and Flower scent :D, thank you so much. (flower scent I'm mostly continuing this one for you)

I really think I should also notify you that I will probably abandon this story sorrowfully because it is not getting much reviews and so I really have no idea whether you guys enjoy reading it or not, while my other story is getting many reviews in no time.

yosh, let's give it a try again...hopefully it will get some reviews this time :)

read and enjoy (hopefully).

* * *

"hey, since when did this "June's sorrow" grow out? we're in April! this plantis crazy, I think it has seriously has some timing problems..." Shizuku said raising her voice as much as possible so that the blond could hear.

"hear that Kurapica? it grew on your birth day! this June's sorrow-no this April's sorrow is you Kurapica...see how beautiful ?" the woman said looking into the eyes of her baby...blue, joyful ,and pure."**_that plant I had planted with your father_**"

the child grew up day by day and her mother was always by her side. They would play together all the time, and have lots of fun with the newly-found piece of heaven. The woman would sleep hugging her daughter and would wake up hugging her too...With Kurapica she always felt as if her husband was with them too. She could always see him in the pretty eyes and the pure smile of the blond little girl, however Shizuku thought that the child looks more like her mother.

* * *

The plant grew up with the child, and by her forth birthday the seed had become a rose tree. Kurapica had enjoyed every second of her four years with her mother and the woman with the non-scarlet eyes, until those days when her mother wasn't feeling fine anymore. The mother knew that the end was too close, but she was satisfied with her achievement- surviving for four years, just for the sake of her daughter. Of course, she wished to live more and stay with her child, But she was sure that Shizuku would take care of her, and that was almost good enough.

But no matter how loving and caring Shizuku was, there was nothing that could replace a mother's love, and there was nothing that could ease the pain the mother was feeling...the emotional pain more than the physical...the pain of being separated away from her daughter...the pain of being forced to say goodbye...there's no way to change the plane and catch a later one; this was decided by fate.

The woman was lying on some sort of blankets on the floor, and Kurapica was beside her. The woman started laughing faintly with the last droops of life left in her. Kurapica's eyes were directed towards her mother immediately.

"They were wrong" the woman said as a slight smile formed on her lips, yet it was warm enough to make the timid child relax

"The old story of June's sorrow was wrong" the woman stated "the old woman was pregnant! the plant only grew when she gave birth to her daughter"

Kurapica didn't know what was her mother talking about exactly, but she wouldn't waste any time asking.

"I...I love you mama" the child said hugging her mother ever so gently, aware of the possible pain she could cause to her mother.

"I love you too" the woman said before she kissed her child for the last time before she fell asleep then, and **_forever_**.

The child's cry was coming out of the deepest point in her heart, burning everything along the way to Shizuku's heart.

Shizuku knew that the woman had died, and that her comrades -Genei Ryodan- would get rid of the child.

* * *

In Meteor city, it wasn't merely a habit to throw away orphans or unwanted children. No one of the people could take care of a stranger...They rarely ever could take care of their own children let alone strangers'. When they could barely get enough food to stay alive they definitely weren't going to give it away to others. Poverty taught them selfishness and violence. In the jungle you had to fight on your own to stay alive and not be eaten. plus, Genei Ryodan weren't the ones with the big hearts. They were a dangerous group of thieves and murderers who ruled Meteor City by force. They weren't kurutas, as not only kurutas lived in Meteor City.

Their boss; Kuroro was the strongest person in Meteor cCity, and he could probably be the strongest man on earth, only if he was tested. He never liked kurutas because he could see potential power in some of them, and he was said to have sold his comrades of them to police. However, all of Genei Ryodan members were very strong as "the strongest rules" was the one and only rule in Meteor Mity.

Shizuku didn't want to give up the child, but she knew it wasn't her choice; it was her boss' choice; kuroro's choice...Mhe was a Genei Gyodan member after all, whether kurutas knew that or not, and so she had no chance; she had to give Kurapica away.

the child didn't have any idea of what was going to happen, but a big man- Uvogin as she heard- held her up and started running at the speed of light along with his comrade all the way out of meteor city. she struggled so hard trying to let go of them but what chance could she have against two monsters.

Shizuku's heart shattered into pieces, hearing the child crying as she followed the men speechlessly, with teary eyes.

* * *

the men took the child far away that she couldn't remember the way back home anymore. Finally they let the child go and walked toward Shizuku.

"Kurapica, I'm so sorry, just stay in your place, and I'll come back and bring you food and everything" The young woman cried. After all she was **_attached_**to the child.

"And don't ever dare to get close to the cops; they would kill you" Shizuku said with tears running down her face before she walked away with the men by her sides. They walked away that kurapica couldn't see them anymore...Kurapica was left alone.

All alone in that deserted rout in some weird town,vengeance was shining scarlet red in her eyes...Somehow an angel at this very young age, could still hold grudges like a devil.

she didn't want Shizuku's help anymore; hasn't she abandoned her already? but the fact was that she **_needed _**her_ help._ she decided to wait for Shizuku, doubting that she would come though.

She sat on the ground in some abandoned corner and put her head between her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around her legs, re-viewing all the recent events in her mind... her mother's death, the scary men, and the woman with the non-scarlet eyes who left her alone...

She hadn't eat at all for the last day, and she only had her light dirty clothes on her, and they were too light for the cold that was running along her back...How could it be so cold while they were in April? such a weird town...

By the night's dark, rain started falling mixing those painful tears with the cold scary raindrops which were total strangers. The child shivered as her clothes were totally wet. It was too cold for her to think or cry anymore. Her crimson eyes finally cooled down and she hugged herself even tighter shivering and clashing rain never stopped falling for the next day, and shizuku never showed up again.

Thoughts started rushing in Kurapica's mind. Was Shizuku going to leave her? Was she going to come back? Should she stay in her place watching death as it approached slowly? Or should she stand up and search for something to eat or at least a shelter to keep of the rain? Did Shizuku betray her? Or would **_she be betraying_**Shizuku if she walked away of her place?

The girl was too young to analyze what surrounded her, although she was smarter than anyone at the age of four...She was too young to make such a choice that could mean death...And most importantly too young to be left alone.

* * *

thank you so much for reading this far...I shall let you know that_** killua and Leorio**_will appear in the next chapter (yes, we won't have any drama, there will be some happy chapters now :D )

please let me know what you think. I really don't know if I should write this story anymore, and I need your opinion...anything you say is more than appreciated.

thank you, dear reader for putting up with me this much n.n


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